Evangelists of life in outer space, Lauren Sánchez and Jeff Bezos already live on another celestial body.
Welcome to the Ridiculous Planet, population: 2.
He Vogue December Issue, starring Sánchez, 53, takes us mere mortals on a tour of his otherworldly position, full of climatic hypocrisy and daisies. The latter helps the former to fall easily.
There are helicopter rides, several luxury properties and a giant pink diamond engagement ring (“When Jeff opened the box, I think I fainted a little.”)
At one point, Sánchez correct the belief that the voluptuous figurehead on the front of Bezos’s $500 million superyacht, the largest of its kind in the world, is his image.
“Whether was I…” says Sánchez, sculpting the air to suggest larger breasts.
Once, Sánchez explains, she and Kim Kardashian got into a bidding war over a Balenciaga couture dress. Kardashian, a friend, suggested they buy it together and pass it around, like a multimillion-dollar version of Brotherhood of the Traveling Pants. Instead, what luck! — the designer offered to make two; Each of them contributed $200 and they will travel together to Paris for a test.
Equally identifiable: Sánchez remembers being present on Blue Origin’s first manned flight to suborbital space in 2021. “They were making jokes in the capsule,” he says of Bezos & Co. with “feigned disbelief” (Vogue’s words). “While I literally cry holding her mother.”
However, Sánchez plans to embark on a journey with Blue Origin next year.
“Jeff always says, ‘Build the path to space so our kids can build the future.’ And that’s what it’s about. Launch, land, repeat, over and over again so we discover how to have reusable rockets…
“I say magical not much? he asks with a big smile.
In a Vogue cartoon, Bezos, who surely had other things to do that day? – Plays the bartender in the “Astronaut Village” section of the 400,000-acre West Texas ranch he purchased in 2004.
While making margaritas for his fiancée and the writer (Candice Bergen’s daughter, who is no mere mortal), the 59-year-old billionaire meticulously measures Milagro tequila and triple sec.
Bezos— Wearing tiger’s eye bracelets and silver chains like a Las Vegas magician circa 2005, he cuts perfect half-moon-shaped lime slices before realizing he’s missing an essential ingredient.
“I don’t think we have salt. She was going to give you a salty edge. It is a very important part of the daisy,” says the third richest man in the world.
After eight minutes, a container of salt appears, causing Bezos to “marvel”: “Wow, there’s like a salt genie out there!”
That’s one way of referring to hired help.
Sánchez talks about her and Bezos’s philanthropy, including supporting free preschool education and trips to Tijuana to cut zucchini in a relief kitchen. She brags about the Bezos Earth Fund, which has committed $10 billion to environmental causes.
“I think Jeff and I are really focusing on long-term commitment to climate, and we’re extremely optimistic about that,” he says, noting that his 417-foot yacht, Koru, can sail using wind power.
“We have done it and it is magical,” says Sánchez, a phrase that suggests that it is the exception and not the rule.
But the story also describes a whirlwind schedule that finds the couple flying weekly up the West Coast from Los Angeles, where their children live part-time with their father, Hollywood agent Patrick Whitesell, to Bezos’ home base in Seattle. ; Soon, the trips will become longer as they plan to move to Miami. There are also campus visits to see Bezos’ four college-aged children (at least one of them is reported to be in Princeton, about 2,750 miles from Los Angeles).
I’d bet my Delta Miles that they have more flight time in a week than most of us do in five years. But, apparently, by investing 10 billion dollars, the almighty carbon neutrality is achieved.
However, Sánchez protests: “Our lives are quite normal.”
I also remember that time I went camping and ordered custom-made chaps for everyone on the trip.
For Sanchez’s upcoming wedding, she tells Vogues she’s looking at dresses from Christian Dior, Dolce & Gabbana, and Valentino. Although her sister, Elena Sánchez Blair, insists that that is not really who the future Mrs. Bezos is: “… the truth is that most of the time we are on the couch in sweatshirts and yoga pants, playing Sloppy Dice or Heads Up on our phones. “
Sánchez, who started dating Bezos in 2019, chooses to explain who she is through a more cinematic lens.
“Of course, Jeff’s favorite movie. [of the summer] it was ‘Oppenheimer’ and I love ‘Barbie,’” she tells Vogue. “And there you have us summarized in two films.”
In fact, Sánchez is the Barbie that Mattel never made.
Everything about her, from her breasts to her giant lips to her sculpted biceps that say “I can afford to spend four hours a day working out,” is totally over the top, like a cartoon.
But I must say that there is something attractive and intriguing about Sánchez: his high octane the joy of living.
She has a sense of humor and self, which is a rarity in the Bezos stratosphere.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard her complain.
Billions of dollars may alleviate grievances, but today, deep pockets and privileges Don’t always inoculate people against victimhood. Hello, Meghan Markle. Sanchez seems to know how lucky she and Bezos are. He gives the impression that they are having a great time living large.
Also, give credit where credit is due. According to Vogue, Sanchez slept in the back seat of her Arizona grandmother’s Ford while the woman drove to clean houses at 5 a.m., and then got ready for school at the restaurant her grandmother ran as her second job.
Sánchez overcame dyslexia, graduated from USC, became a television host in Los Angeles, learned to fly, and started her own successful aerial filming business.
She is optimistic. And formidable.
“One thing I learned about Lauren is that if I’m in a bind, I can throw the gun at her,” Bezos says.
“I think I can get him out of most situations,” he agrees. “I would fly him out!”
Maybe I’d fly him to the nearest Gucci to buy leather pants and an extravagant hat. But that seems to be his modus operandi: he makes the third richest man in the world infinitely more ridiculous, but also more interesting.
And he does it without apology.
